I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
