so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
