it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
