its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
