were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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