so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
