it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
