Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
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I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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