Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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