Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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