It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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