i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I could make wine with my vomit
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
