How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i already hear my dad disowning me
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
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