So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
