My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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