she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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