just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
