My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
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in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
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Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
third nipple confirmed
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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