Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
