Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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