stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
