we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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