your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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