I need help removing her.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
