Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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