omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize
