i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
