so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Randomize
