i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
