Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
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