we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
