Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
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her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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