Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
You're breaking my sexual little heart
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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