did you get engaged???
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
