I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
