u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
