garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
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