Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
