He asked me if I "almost moaned"
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
