Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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