porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize