I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
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