just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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