who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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