Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
