all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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