some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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