Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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