yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
