All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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